in rose-tinted glasses

People.

They always fall inlove. Almost always, in the wrong and different ways. They break out from the conventional and test the waters. Sometimes, all of it. And when they do, God knows just how far one can go.

try and try and try and...

Know that I tried.

It was Holy Week, as a sacrifice I gave up I cut all my wiry connections for the whole week to allow myself to live without it and prove that I am not among the millions who cannot. At least, there was a greater purpose. No cellphones, no Facebook, no Twitter, no anything. The computer plug wasn't even touched from Monday to a few minutes ago. And for someone like me who's always wired, it's a gigantic success... Or not. This week I have to confess, I have completed Plants VS Zombies. I was the first to do so against my brothers. Should I be proud or not? I don't know. It was Holy Week, and I was supposed to do holier stuffs. I did, actually. I really really did. But that PVZ thing, it knocked the whole of me. It was an addiction. But then, it happened only today. And Jesus ascended back to heaven around this time too, and scientists nor historians cannot even digress what time He did. So I'm supposing that all the while I completed PVZ, Christ was already up there :-) And yes, we have an even greater reason to rejoice. Happy Easter, everyone!

bitches finish first

Yes. They almost always finish first. The good girls are stuck at detours, the good girls are lugged behind, the good girls follow all the rules and drive to the straight path people tell them to cross. It will always be a slow turn, but then we must also keep in mind that they are always able to finish the race too, armed with a good record, and obedient followings ---- but they are the last ones to do so, the last ones who never see the ribbon still uncut. Good girls are good girls whose halos are quite invisible if not for the wings that make them angelic. And oh, their sweet faces too. But bitches? Who wants bitches anyway? They equal tattooed girls who rally through the streets parading their attitudes that won't pass the standards of your parents dressed with tattered jeans and midriff-showing tops (okay, sometimes it's the boobs that show), hairbrushes were out of the vocabulary and kohl eyeliners are everywhere. But  they always finish first. Now I'd love to hear you tell me something about how the ends justify the means.

day 1: initiation

30 minutes later than usual. 15 ladies. 2 guys. 1 collaborative effort. Uncharted ideas.

Finally the homebound-days are over!!! I have enrolled at SoFA (School of Fashion and the Arts) in Makati for their styling workshop under Fold Canela. Finally getting real dibs on both the glamorous and un-glamorous side of fashion styling. And yes, those teeny weeny steps to actually being IT. As of now I'm hunting for ideas for my mood board as our homework tonight (note: it's 1:47 in the morning of April 26th, I'm talking about April 25th). Everything's just so exciting! Earlier we were grouped into 5's and made tops, dresses, headpieces, and bottoms over just one scarf. We bagged the first point!

If

It's the saddest word in the English language. Sadder than regret, loneliness, and farewell. Two letters in the alphabet combined to create a power to fill you with questions which even you cannot answer at that point. Or maybe never. Only in daring to cross the fence and brave to see the other side of it can lead you to little clues that bring light in seeing little pieces that may finally erase the curiosity. One too many times we are just afraid to take that tiny step out of our comfort zones. To seemingly release into the unfamiliar and unsecure state of ourselves. We begin to be so caught up by the tiny what-ifs that it's only later, perhaps, never we discover that we have just passed up to the biggest magic in our lives. But what if it was for the bad?  Well you have conquered yourself above anything else. You have mustered the courage like nobody can. And at the very least, you have tried.

forget regret or life is yours to miss

Usually I'd find myself sitting, then subtly opening the fridge checking for food to eat, then logging online on my accounts still checking, and finally getting a hold of the remote and do the whole routine. It's summer farchrissake!

Clicking HOME on Facebook for the nth time and seeing a note by one of my friends written with so much passion and sincerity made me wake up to the reality that I am currently this one big human Garfield all this time. I have to agree, I have not been myself lately. Lately being not just a few days or weeks - but for two years, to be counting. Really. And I look back with regret seeing how unproductive I've been. Hah! Trash the people who said that they never regret a thing in their lives, good or bad, all because it taught them lessons. For one thing, I could have repeated those days where I could have maximized my potentials and slept a little bit later because I was writing and finishing reading something instead of checking Facebook and updating my Twitter by the minute. Oh wait, that's not always the case. You see, I work best on the last hours when meeting deadlines. The stress to rush things immediately gives me a sudden surge of creative juice. Which also comes with all the minuses on the grades I should have been getting. But I'm cool with it though, because I'd always have the best work in class. The grades just didn't come with it. Another thing, my past blog entries aren't in its tiptop shape as before. I've noticed. Locked is the creativity. Dumped is the purpose. And this, this is one evidence of it. :-D

twitter

So I've decided that after seven months, it was high time to do some revamp.

shebangs!

(c) Carl Samson. People said I looked Kpop. Hahaha.

Last Friday I woke up to the same hair whose ends I curled every now and then and decided it flow down to my shoulders once more. Glancing in the mirror and out I walked............... came back again, picked scissors, and figured that it's bound to be a new day. *wink*

'Tis the SEASON

All the more that I grow older, the more I find out and discover that Christmas is much more deeper than  having a lot of foods served on the table by the eve of 25th, much more deeper than the gifts we put beneath the decorated pine tree, and much more deeper than the thought of merry-making. This Christmas, all of those were physically absent. Sure, it made a difference. But after awhile you just realize a lot of things you've never realized when all those material things sugarcoated what should not have been repeatedly overlooked: Jesus.

I woke up to my cellphone beeping endlessly last December 24th. Greetings from loved ones - even the people I barely even knew - suddenly filled my cellphone, Twitter updates, and Facebook notifications. It was overwhelming. I was happy about it. For one day, all the people just became really close. I walk past the street, by the mall, and greet random people a Happy Christmas. For the whole 24th and 25th, my mindset was put on greeting everyone that I can and wish them a lovely day ahead. I cannot say that I was not even successful. My too sunshine-y aura just couldn't help it. Hahaha.

On the 26th, there was still an overflow of greetings and the spirit is still so alive! Christmas isn't just one day.

Or how I revealed Facebook my innermost feelings.

Hi Self! Two pounds in two days, eh? And you have approximately 15 days more to vacation. Remember that. You don't really want to be adding 15 more after today. *smile*

But... it's the holiday season! ----> *FACEPALM* THE PERFECT EXCUSE

Ding-dong-December

It's December first, everyone!!! Kenny G Christmas classics filled my morning as dad pumped up the car with it. And while we were driving the roads at exactly 5:40 in the morning for school, I felt exactly the Christmas chills seeing the streets so quiet with people just starting their days. The Christmas light decors by the streets are still on.. greeting and flashing your day its sweetest jingle bell hellos. And oh, by the way, that's my most favorite Christmas song up there ;-)

On Academic Planning and Life Mapping

Been gone in the blogosphere for awhile. It took me countless days mapping out what I called my life. Planning excites me, as you all know. :) Hahaha.


Was talking to Arvin a few days ago with my mind completely scattered elsewhere on thinking about pursuing collegiate studies here in the Philippines. He dealt a pretty good advice on just about everything I was pure question marked of. The thought of studying in Australia was one thing that I've been so much looking forward to since what, years ago. Even before college. See, that's how strong I planned. Lol. As luck would probably have have it, I've been spending two years of my college life in the country. Now, not that I am saying that I'm particularly un-challenged with the environment I've been moving my academic life with.. it's just that I feel like I can do more with my potentials. I feel that there is a bigger world I could move in. I don't want to be stuck in the same spot over and over again. Yes. I might have been continuously brushing and polishing my name here, but I feel that it just isn't enough. Why shine and let it look clear when it can shine and let it look like a diamond, right? I hope I made perfect sense in those comparisons. Hahaha. I am always two to three years advanced in mapping out my future. And I'm serious about it. Getting reeeeeally serious about it. Next year (as everyone probably attest themselves too) is gunna be my year. Yep, it may not have been my months sometimes, but it's gunna be my year. And so does everyone's. Hahaha. Mom and Dad just started doing house renovations so I'm slightly crossing out my chances of transferring to another university since I feel that they'd want both me and my brother here than get a dormitory or a condo. Family first. That brings me perfectly being content to where I am now and just stretch out the possibilities. Which leads me to doing a lot of workshops the whole year next year (fashion, dance, journalism, music..), and finally getting into the much-coveted reporting project by mid-year in 2011. After which I explore the opportunities in the media sector by doing editorial stints and the like. Which also diverts me to finally earn moolah to finance my Master's Degree (Executive Master of Arts) myself. Yep. Although I perfectly know my folks could sustain it, I think it would be better if I do go the Ms. Independent Way. That said, I'm thinking of spending it in Australia after finishing my Bachelor's Degree in the Philippines. And by the way, since graduation is just mere two years away (hopefully), I'll be spending one year first getting a Diploma in Fashion Design and Marketing before heading on to my Master's. That gives me sufficient funds by again, doing hope-it-works stints myself. If I'm still okay with my Math, college degree graduation and diploma course combined, I'm already twenty-one years young finishing those two. That gives me until twenty-five years old to finish my Master's. Great! I love it! And by twenty-five years old, erm, young.. God knows what I am doing and will be doing. :-) I just looove it to pieces. Of course, all these are really tentative as I don't know how life will be changing me in the next couple of months, or even years. But nevertheless, let's all pray that this is gonna be great. If you love me, you will. Hahaha! Now Amen to that! ;-)


xxo

Fangirl no-no

No. I am not a fan of beer nor cigarettes. I am not a fan of bar-hopping and hooking up. I am not a fan of cutting classes. I am not a fan of show-offs. I am not a fan of better-than-yous. I am not a fan of endlessly giving myself to random guys. I am not a fan of going with the flow. I am not a fan of always doing it your way. I am not a fan of what everybody wants, I want toos. I am not a fan of obvious loud talking as if you always carry a megaphone with you. I am not a fan of flirting to the maximum level. I am not a fan of being complacent, of resting in my laurels. I am not a fan of idleness. I am not a fan of bashing other people. I am not a fan of having a good laugh on that ugly person beside you. I am not a fan of extreme shalaness. I am not a fan of spending time with people I half as much like as I do with dusts. I am not a fan of overly made up faces. I am not a fan of mushy-mushy couples displaying affections in public. I am not a fan of not listening to the professor in class. I am not a fan of making faces behind your professor's back just so because your classmates think you're cool. I am not a fan of bitter faces. I am not a fan of feeling superior. I am not a fan of ugly attitudes.

Open happiness

Woke up seeing a bunch of Cokes by the pantry.. and I smiled. :) The kind when life seems to pause and you think of happy thoughts. Not that I drink sodas, but Coca Cola's bright red designs for the season always makes me feel its really really Christmas already. ♥

Yes, it's Daddy's. Of course.

 

...because it's feel good Fridays. ;-)

Do you sometimes not really know what you yourself are feeling? Like it's so mixed that you can't ever figure out if it should scare you or guarrantee you your happiness. And most of all, you don't really know what to do with it when you feel you should. I hate feeling like this.

The lion

Do you really believe in horoscope readings? Or feng shui?

I held on to the notion of disregarding supernatural beliefs and believe merely what I see (ghostly encounters are not an exception). I've laughed to the likes of the infamous Madame Auring which shaped my views of these horoscope readers often known as fortune tellers as pure joke. Books have always told me that I create my future, but in what line do we set our personal feats and what others dictate of how our future will be? It's always funny.

Well it never hurts to take someone's words for your own sake. It somehow gives you another perspective of how things will be like in the days to come. Of course, we filter what stays in our minds and what must be trashed.

My horoscope snippets in Philippine Daily Inquirer are chillingly revealing what reality has been slapping me these past few days. I've made it a point to skip reading the horoscope part  in the morning and instead browse through it at night - to check if they are purely baloney or well, serious as they sound.

One time, the whole day I was building concepts of starting and managing a business venture (so I don't go broke on vacations. It's hard, you know. Hahaha.), make it big, and have it as the starting point of a career in a certain industry. Then my horoscope read that "..today, you will be very busy putting yourself in the aspect of business-related matters.." I said it's just a coincidence. Until Wednesday night it read "Now your attention turns to home and domestic matters, probably for the next six weeks. Think of how you can improve your home or where you live today. In particular, think about cleaning up garbage areas or areas under sinks or in the basement. It's a good day to get rid of clutter and junk! Home-decorating projects will appeal." But I was just being very domestic (un)goddess and all that the whole day! Seriously, I was suddenly so motivated to do major cleaning in my room - even the whole house! The moment I read the last word of my horoscope reading, it sent tingles in my spine. Are horoscope readings true or mere coincidences? But everyday that I read it, everyday it also matches my life. Obviously my thinking that there are about a million other people who has the same zodiac sign as mine LIVES THE SAME (OR OKAY, PARTLY THE SAME) REALITIES THAT I LIVE is crazy. And stupid. But if I base my answer on believing what horoscopes say, does that justify it?

And oh. By the way, because I'm starting my Christmas...

WEDDING BELLS RING for new Mr. and Mrs. Wilbur

Eight years and counting! And today, you're married? Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Wilbur!!!

I am beyond the world happy for my cousin Raissa Dalusung - Wilbur (yay! cheers!) that she's now officially married to Mike! That's solid eight years of relationship! I cannot possibly imagine that these two people who started their relationship at mere sixteen years of age would really end up walking the aisle at age twenty-four, but well surprise! We're all happy and amazed by you two guys!!! A toast to more years of that. ;-)  *HUGHUGHUG*